Does your hairdresser caress your ear?

I kid you not.

So I decided to take a stroll to the hairdresser around the corner. My regular hairdresser went on MC today and will continue to be away for the Chinese New Year. Well, I do need to look decent for the New Year when visiting relatives. Also, there is this cousin's wedding coming up and I really do not want to turn up at his wedding with the newly shorn look. Today would be a good day to cut hair.

Gone are the days when I went to ethnic barbers to have my hair cut. When I mean ethnic, I mean barber shops with chairs in a row manned by either Malays (always known as Sri Dewa), the Chinese (known for using a blade to scrape your neck after the cut, and also provide ear digging services), and the Indian barber. A haircut will set you back no more than S$10 for an adult male. I have given up on those days. Being converted whilst studying overseas, I have since moved on to professional hairstylists who actually wash your hair before the cut (ok, ok, it took me that long to progress). But progress I did! I have had my hair cut in New York City, Toronto, Melbourne, etc. Some of them are pretty good stylists. My all time favourite -- Jack Giordano, an Italian who emigrated to Burlington, Ontario, Canada. He rocks!

I entered the hairdresser that was around the corner, for the first time. I was attended by a gentleman who resembled someone just released delinquent school. But then, judge not, I must. Because Chinese New Year is around the corner, it is a practice that hairdressers and barbers impose a mandatory self declared tip, on top of the regular price of a haircut. I shrugged it off. Where else would I go? To the military barber? God forbid!

I must say that his scalp massage was pretty good and decided to relax and enjoy the hair wash.


When it was time to rinse my hair at the sink, I lay back and let the water do its job. Well, looks like the water was not the only thing doing its job.

I realised that the male hairdresser was caressing my ear!

(I pause here to choke)

And he did it while washing my hair and ear and cupping it ever so tenderly....arrgh!

I need a cold shower.

Ok, so maybe I was overreacting. But honestly, the way he did it and the amount of time he took to wash my hair (and ears), I am really intrigued that his lady boss (sitting outside reading a mag) did not even complain about the huge amount of water he had wasted. Honestly, I have never had a longer hair wash in my life! And while my gay-dar was on (ya know, radar for a different sexual orientation), right in front of me was a promotional poster for a hair product where the model was topless save her hands cupping her breast strategically. I guess the Yin and Yang of things are balanced here. But hey, that dude is still cupping my ears!

Yes, I may have been over sensitive. But going by my track record, a white guy tried once to pick me up; my very gay colleague would only complete the work if I allowed him to grope my chest; and was once winked at and air kissed by a transvestite at a supermarket....I think it is wise to be a little more alert.

I have nothing against gays per se. It is just those who are the desperate ones who are trying hard to 'get to know you', them I detest. Much like a creep who thinks he is god's gift to women, harassing every skirt that walks by him.

I suddenly am gaining an insight into a woman's violation...

After the haircut was done (which was done quite decently), and the payment made, hairdresser gave me his sweetest smile and waved effeminately, while leaning on one leg and making limp the other.

I'm going back to Agnes next time round.