Nasty! Tales of stool samples II

So, after having had a great dinner (cooked by none other than yours truly), The Wife and I retired to bed, looking forward to the following day.

Morning breaks. The Wife is off to work. I get up.

Crap. (quite literally)

I do need to complete my unfinished task from yesterday's visit to the doctor.


Eyeing the sample bottle in the corner, I reluctantly grabbed it and went to sit on the bowl.

Sigh.

Sometimes a man has to do what a man has to do. Even if it is crap.

The Wife often says "Poo-ing is the most wonderful part of the day, when toxins are released and you feel at ease with yourself".

She is quite the comedienne.

All right, I have taken in sufficient amounts of veggies the night before. Let's do it!

OK, the dump is released. OK, I am unscrewing the sample bottle. OK, I will attempt Option A (read about Option A in the entry before this). OK, I will.......

We have a problem.

Now, it is to my understanding that there is a certain Law of Human Wastes that attributes each person's dump to be known as a 'Sinker' or a 'Floater'. Self explanatory, right?

Mine, today, happened to be a Sinker.

NOOooooooo............

Deep breaths......deep breaths......Why me????

Just on the verge of giving up in despair, I looked in once again and spotted a renegade 'Floater'!

Option A in progress!

In order to provide some visual decency whilst walking to the doctor's with my catch, I placed the container into an all white opaque bag, like the ones the doctors give you when medicine is dispensed.

Now, I am really fortunate to live right across the street from my doctor's. This is one asset that I am really interested in getting rid off real quick.

Walking pass the bus stop, a couple of people gave my bag a cursory glance.

Ma'am, you wouldn't want to know what's inside.

Crossing the zebra crossing, the driver had to jam on his brakes to let me cross.



Lucky thing you did that, otherwise I will fling.......



We are now walking through the coffee shop front. I gave the Mixed Rice seller a quick dirty look. He has a habit of chatting up girls buying rice from him and giving very few ingredients to male customers. Perhaps, today is his day of retribution if I would just......

Next shop was the pawn shop (no.....there is nothing wrong with my spelling). Some ladies were inside claiming or pawning off their valuables. I wonder if I could get money in exchange for my gold.....

The doctor happened to be in the waiting area as I entered the clinic.

"Coming to deposit something my friend?", he eyed me with a grin.

Most definitely.