It has been a long time...

Ah yes...to all of you who have been faithfully stopping by my blog, many thanks to you!

Indeed, it has been a while since I updated this blog. Why? Well, lethargy is one reason. The new kid in the house can be another. And of course, there is work and church stuff....but of course there is also the part time studies I am involved in.

Am I mad, committing myself to so many things?

Well, let's just say that I kinda like a full life.

Let me take this time to share with you some insights I have truly learnt through the course of this year. These insights were probably head knowledge to me in the past, but I can truly share these thoughts from first hand experience. You may not agree with them, and that is fine. But if you find them useful or interesting, would be glad to hear from you:

1) Work hard 20% of the time. But work smarter 80% of the time

2) Efficiency should be used wisely

3) Paper qualifications are quite useless, really

4) Try hard as you may, work and human emotions cannot be separated from each other

5) In life, its all about people

6) Determination usually gets you what or where you want. If your dream is worth pursuing, just be ready for the long haul

7) Try not to know too much. Just know enough

8) It's ok not to know what your next step or plan is

9) The highest form of manipulation is when your opposition thinks that he has manipulated you, but in actual fact, you are manipulating him

10) Many times, we need our enemies more than we need our friends

Disclaimer: Do take the above with a pinch of salt. The above do not always apply to all situations.

cheers!

And then there were 3...

OK, I must admit I have succumbed to popular demand...I am updating my blog!

Yes, it has been some time since I wrote my last entry. Was it writer's block or something else? I dunno. It could have been attributed to pregnancy...of my wife, silly!

Anyways, on the fateful day of Sept 11th, I became a dad! There is now absolutely no excuse for me to forget my dear son's birthday.

I am sure you all want the lowdown on the birth of this beautiful creature, so here are the statistics of my son's birth:

No. of hrs wife in labour: 10 hours

Administration of Epidural (pain relief): At first, no. Wife very brave. Then we had to give it to her

Time from start of pushing to delivery: 29mins

No. of days spent in hospital post delivery: 2 nights (check out time 12pm...like hotel like that)

Number of times poo-ed in 1st day: Lost count

Weight after Hospital checkout: 2.4kg (normal for baby to lose weight after delivery)

Weight after 3 days from hospital checkout: 2.7kg (100g weight gain per day!)

Cost of hospital stay: S$2,000+

Cost of seeing your baby burp at you: Priceless

Looking at the picture above, I must assure you I am not trying to kill my kid through strangulation. Rather, I am trying to burp him. But one thing though, check out his really big bright eyes and his really Lao Been (old looking face). Picture above was taken when he was 3 days old!

I am so blessed.

Branding...more than just stamping on a cow

Branding.

Definitely one of the most misunderstood words in the English language.

Ask almost anyone about the definition of Branding, and most will refer in some way to a logo; a typeface (font); an advertising campaign; or a packaging design.

Key in 'Definition of Branding' into Google and what you get is a slew of definitions that (believe it or not) differ one from the other as if it were night and day.

One definition I pulled out from the web is this:

"The process by which both a brand and brand identity are developed"

Another states:

"...the process of building a favorable image for a product or company that differentiates it, in the minds of prospects and end users, from other competitors"

Another guru proposes:

"...is the assignment of value to products through naming, packaging, marketing, and advertising"

My favourite is this:

"The use of a hot metal object to scar the body. Sometimes seen as the "ultimate" act of submission"

Indeed, the shrewd brand owner knows how to make consumers yield themselves towards a certain brand, 'submitting' to the brand's perceived value and associations!

May I then propose the definition of Branding, in my humble opinion?

"The building and protection of a Branded product or service, towards achieving the aim of financial profits"

There we go!

Wasn't too difficult to swallow, was it?

I can almost recall a friend of mine saying this when I lamented to her on the lack of true marketers, "Stop being such a bl***y purist!"

(swear word sensored to protect young readers out there. Honestly, I truly think that the expletive vocabulary of my 12 year old friends truly surpass me in every aspect. I am just being civil for appearance sake)

But yeah, back to branding.

A study was done by the John Hopkins Bloomberg School of Health where 63 preschoolers were asked to sample two meals, each consisting of a chicken nugget, a quarter of a hamburger, french fries, two baby carrots and a small cup of milk.

Although both meals came from a local McDonalds, only one of them appeared in its original packaging. Researchers presented items from the other meal in plain wrappers, which lacked the company's distinctive logo.

In most cases children said they tasted a difference between the two meals, and they overwhelmingly preferred the McDonalds-branded foods. (New Scientist.com News Service, Roxanne Khamsi, Fast Food branding makes children prefer happy meals, 6th August 2007)

It was a pretty amazing study. The children actually preferred carrots wrapped in 'McDonalds' branded packaging ---- even though it does not exist on McDonald's menu!

Yes, the art of branding is that of attracting people to buy your brand so that you can earn profits. Not just recognizing your brand only, but converting that recognition into a sale...hopefully many times over.

In the case of Budweiser and the talking frogs campaign is a great example of people recognizing the Budweiser Beer brand and campaign, but resulted in lower sales. And while the brand recall was high, it only fulfilled the first part of my definition, it did not fulfill the latter part sufficiently.

http://www.mycustomer.com/cgi-bin/item.cgi?id=133055&d=2043 ("Frog in the Throat" section)

As a Brand Manager, I can only say that I am still learning and have much more to learn.

And so, if you ever hear of anyone claiming that Branding is easy peasy, please excuse him for he is not of a sound mind. Otherwise, please refer him to me --- I can put him in touch with a farmer who requires farm help to stamp marks on his cows.

The Little Red Dot

It is interesting how something initially seen as deragatory can be turned around and used as something positive.

The term "red dot", was first used in 1998 by the former president of Indonesia, B.J. Habibie, when he made this quote, pointing at a map on a wall to the interviewer, "It’s OK with me, but there are 211 million people (in Indonesia). Look at that map. All the green (area) is Indonesia. And that red dot is Singapore. Look at that.”

Reaction to that term was swift and furious from all corners of ASEAN. Interestingly, our country's leaders picked up on this term and used it to their advantage. Rather than associating the "Little Red Dot" term negatively, they used it to reiterate how vulnerable Singapore is. Similarly, while we are small, we are also 'Red' ---- a fiery chilli padi that can make things happen.

Thank God for wise leaders.

This same term has been immortalised in a title of a book about Singapore's foreign service --- 'The Little Red Dot. Reflections by Singapore's Diplomats'.

I am currently reading this compilation of short essay pieces from Singapore's diplomatic corp, relating the tough times they faced protecting and lobbying for Singapore's interests in the nasty world of global politics. Indeed, all Singaporeans owe a debt to these men and women who worked most of their lives overseas so that we can have a better life.

If you are into current affairs, politics, international relations and economics, this book would interest you. Otherwise, I would just simply direct you to Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. The Wife has been hogging the Harry Potter book for the past week now.

And then there are the more learned ones...

Keeping it Simple

The article above is written by Phillip Kotler, a renown marketing guru of our age.
I feel that he wisely narrows down the requirements to be a great marketer at the top of your game:

1) Differentiate - Always have a selling point
2) Creative - Think outside the box
3) Leadership - All marketers should be leaders, not administrators

I wonder then, why the degree is known as Master of Business Administration (MBA). On saying that, I do agree with Kotler. We sometimes just cannot let go and tend to micromanage.

Agree?

Of course, the slackers among us are giving me back slaps.

Balance, folks...that's what I am aiming to get.

But of course, if you happen to be selling courses on 'teaching' you to be a great marketer or chief executive, you would have to say that the position requires you to be the following (as what a management school advertised in the media):

A Visionary

A Motivator

A Negotiator

An Architect of Organisation Structure and Systems

A Sensor of Market Opportunities

A Creator of Shareholder Value

A Strategist and Policy Maker

A Strategist for Acquisition

An Agent of Change

So complicated...I'd rather go work on a farm.

Anyone hiring farm hands? Will work for food!

My own church

Yes, many people do want to be pastors of their own church.

Me? Nah. I'll pass.

And there will be others who will pounce upon the very opportunity to pastor a church. Some, will resort to underhand tactics and manoeuvres that will put seasoned corporate man to shame. I know. I have seen it happen.

But why?

Short lesson #2156: People desire to have Money and Power.

And the age old question is put forward to you: Would you rather have Money or Power?

Some prefer power, for they rationalise that they can control the rich.

Others say they prefer riches, for they can buy power.

So what better way than to have both --- money and power ---- by being a pastor, or let's broaden it, a religious leader.

"Oh come on now (as you naysayers and hypocrites declare), these people are always honest and after all, they are 'God's people'."

That is exactly the point, NOT!

In the real world, head honchos are constantly being constantly bombarded internally and externally, for the decisions and non-decisions that they make. Your political rival is doing his or her job well, when he or she manages to dig some dirt onto you and cause you to fumble and 'lose face'. Sometimes, it can be so bad, you will have to leave office without a pair of pants to your name --- just like that Bill Clinton guy (except that I think he deliberately left office without his pants).

Back to my point.

Would you ever dare 'question' your religious leader on the decisions that he makes? Some of us would. Most of us wouldn't.

Why?

'cos he will get god to strike you down with a lightning rod! And the more dominant and charismatic you are as a religious leader, it is very likely that your job is a relatively cushy one. After all, if someone comes and creates trouble, you could immediately choose to go into a trance and declare that the trouble maker is possessed by an evil spirit causing disharmony in the organization. That will be enough to have your faithful followers pick the trouble maker by his collar and drag him into the nearest dump.

Not to mention the gratitude your followers will have after you have 'positively' identified and cleansed the 'holy place' of the trouble maker, thereby maintaining harmony in the religious body. They will show their gratitude by heaping their riches onto you --- all in the name of giving to god, of course. And you being the godly person, would not reject riches for 'your god'...except that you happen to be spending all of god's money on yourself.

Of course, I am sweeping in my statements. But we do not have to look far for such examples.

In fact, our local Voluntary Welfare Organizations (VWO) are currently seeing some of their top guys scoot off with donors' monies, some quietly, others in broad daylight.

I am thankful for our country's leaders and for my church leaders, who are human nonetheless, but are focused on where they stand...

....'cos if they're not, I will be one of the first to drag them by the collar and throw them into the nearest dump.

The taxi driver with 6 fingers

Fresh from my recently consumed Big Mac meal grabbed on the run, I made my way to meet my business associate, T, at the hotel lobby. We were supposed to catch a cab to the Coach pick up point together half an hour later but the KL traffic was so bad, that we decided to leave immediately.

Dragging my briefcase/luggage, I made my way to the hotel lobby, looking every bit the professional who had come into KL for business and had hit 18 holes and was now making my way to catch a flight.

Looks are terribly deceiving.

After meeting up with T, we stepped outside into the humid PJ air. The air today was less smoggy than it usually was. The rains in the morning had cleared the smog away. It did not matter to me anyway --- I was cooped up in our Office HQ, receiving my Battle Orders to increase sales, increase the pressure, increase distribution, increase brand awareness....in a shorter amount of time.

We stood in line behind a couple who wanted to catch a cab to Bukit Bintang. We waited as the doorman approached an incoming taxi.

"How much to Bukit Bintang?"

The doorman hailed at the couple, " $20 to Bukit Bintang, ok?"

The woman remarked to the man, " Crazy! $20 to Bukit Bintang?"

The doorman took that as a no and waved the taxi on.

The roads in and around KL and PJ were so jammed on a saturday afternoon, that no cab driver wanted to pick any passengers running on the meter. They figured that they were better off quoting a flat fee. For that afternoon, it was the cabbies who were king.

The doorman came back to the queue and approached us.

"Where you going, Sir?"

"Menara Axis."

"OK, you wait here, Sir. Wait for this couple to go first."

I nodded in acknowledgement.

Couple in front of us finally gets a cab that brings them to Bukit Bintang for $10.

We were next in line.

The next cab pulls up to us and the efficient doorman is already briefing him on our destination.

"Sir," said the doorman, facing us, "Will you be able to direct the cabbie to Menara Axis? He is not too familiar with the location."

"Cannot lah, 'bang! Driver should know what! Close to PJ Hilton. If he knows where that is, I can show him."

"Ok, ok, PJ Hilton he knows. It will be $15," replied the doorman.

"Sure or not? He knows ah?" I asked suspiciously.

"No problem, Sir. He says OK. Have a good day!"

I walked towards the trunk to keep our luggage. T stands behind me and squeals, " Eh? Sure or not? He can make it or not? Otherwise we get lost then how?"

"No worries, T. Should be ok."

I crossed both fingers and toes.

We entered the cab. An Indian cabbie is at the wheel.

"Boss, Menara Axis, you tau? Boleh ah? Bagus."

Honestly, it did not do much to assure me. You know, when your cabbie starts shaking his head from side to side in a rocking motion and answers you that he is sure of the destination when initially, he wasn't sure, you start having doubts. But then again, I had to do it to reassure T. After all, what were the chances of finding another cab in this rush hour traffic, to take us to our destination on time?

As soon as we drove out of the hotel driveway, we were immediately faced with the snarling jam. The cabbie remarked," The government bodoh! If we want to go north, should make a road to the right. If we want to travel south, should make a road to the left. What the government do? They make 1 road to the left and both those going north and south use the same road. Stupid dah!"

His dashboard was filled with Hindu inscriptions and mini idols. Cab drivers the world over seem to have this in common --- the reliance on their gods to protect them at their cab driving jobs. The muslims, the buddhists, the taoists, the catholics....they're all the same.

That was when I noticed our cabbies 6 fingers. Left hand was intact with 5 but the right hand was made up of only 1 thumb. Where the rest of the fingers should have been, they were all missing from the knuckles onwards.

"You're a brave man," I remarked.

He looked at me quizzically.

"Your hand," I pointed, "But you still drive."

He looked at me through the mirror and smiled a toothy grin.

"Got to live. Must survive. No problem!"

And he proved it by driving with his right hand only....I mean, his right thumb only.

"So, what happened?" I cautiously prodded.

"I was 18 years old when it happened. Accident."

He went on to describe how he had to be kept in the hospital for 2 months and after that, at home for the next 7 months for the wounds to heal.

"After that 7 months, I told myself that I cannot feel sorry for myself. I must live."

And so he headed to the capital, KL, to find work.

His first job was a petrol pump attendant. The Kiosk attendant took pity on him and allowed him to sleep at the back of the kiosk at night. His salary was $20 ringgit a day.

Then, he came to know the truckers who came to the kiosk to refuel their trucks and soon found that they earned much more than what he had. He plucked the courage to ask one of them for a job and one of them agreed to make him his assistant.

"I sat beside in the truck and helped in everything. When raining, I run back to cover the truck."

It was on one of these rides that his trucker partner asked him to give a go at driving the truck. And as they say, the rest is history.

To get a license to drive a truck, he had to apply at the motor vehicles department. Upon seeing his right hand, they referred him to a doctor to certify that he was able. The doctor took him on a test drive in a car and he passed with flying colours.

"It was easy lah! I sit in the car only and no problem. They give me license to drive car and truck. But no motorcycle. But it's ok."

He and his new trucker friend got along so well for the next 23 years, that he was offered his trucker friend's daughters into marriage. But he declined. It was after driving trucks that he decided to finally go into be a cabbie for the past 3 years. He has a wife and 2 children.

"God give to us healthy body, we must use it to work, to survive. Those who have perfect bodies, do not work, but stick out their hands to ask for money, even god cannot help them."

"I no right hand, never mind. I am already 60+. But you must have the feeling," he points to his head," the feeling to work hard and to live."

I love the lessons gleaned from people, like this Indian cabbie. Professors at top universities have laws, theories and hypotheses. Corporate honchos have their track records and political fights. But people like this cabby, are the real heroes and survivors in our society.

But you must have the feeling...

To blow or not to blow...

*ahem*

ok, now that I've got your attention, let's talk about the whistle blowing of 2Lt Li Hongyi.

A quick background:

This PSC government overseas scholar bound for MIT in the USA, was serving out his National Service as a Platoon Commander when he came across an alleged situation of favouritism in the military. Officer Commanding covering for another Platoon Commander in an alleged case of AWOL (basically, disappearing without anyone knowing where you are or when you will be back).

Usually, such offences are quite servere in the military and are punishable with a decent stay at the Hilton hotel (and you believed me?). Actually, it's the Detention Barracks or the military prison.

2Lt Li got peeved (perhaps this was not the first time he had observed such incidents) and decided to take matters into his own hands. After allegedly going through the proper channels, he decided to air his grievances in an email to the Defence Minister, cc Chief of Defence Forces. Chief of Army, etc.

Oh yes, one more thing -- 2Lt Li is the son of Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong.

This debate has been flying through cyberspace faster than a speeding bullet. Was 2Lt Li right in blowing the whistle? Was this approach appropriate? Was he trying to abuse his position? Or was he just doing the right thing?

You decide for yourself. Read the email found at the link below:

http://tomorrow.sg/comment/view/6468283

I just had to take this Photo

The Manager-on-Duty seems to be taking a break...or wait a sec! He ain't the manager! He's our **st**! What's he doin' there? Moonlighting? We ain't givin' him enough love?

Shock! Horror!

Updates

Hi all,

Just wanted to say a thank you for those who have dropped by this blog (advertently or inadvertently).

What has been happening in my life? Tonnes! I will update more in time to come.

But most recently, I returned from a wonderful church camp at Pulai Springs Golf Resort. Yes, we christians need to be recharged from the daily grind and be provided with Golf Therapy...

And if you really believed that last statement, you must really hate christians that much to believe it...although I actually took time to hit 9-holes. Pretty decent 9-holes played, I must say!

And Oh yes, the above picture is the infinity pool that faces one of the holes in the 36-hole golf course. The voyeur in me had to snap the pic above. Those in Acts, can you guess who those dudes are?

Less than 1 more mth to GST hike

Yes, in case you do not already know (yes, you. The ones living in Singapore!), our Goods and Services Tax (GST) will be raised 2 points to a grand total of 7% this 1 July 2007.

What does this mean?

Everything more expensive lor!

But why increase? Click here to see what the Government says.

One note of caution, most of us will generally be able to get by with our daily expenses. But for those who belong to the lower income group, I strongly suggest they get help to plan their finances.

You have been warned! Dun blur blur and then when 1st July comes, you look at the receipt after buying some stuff from the supermarket and start complaining that the receipt printed wrongly with 7% GST instead of 5%.

What next?

So me and The Wife were in Chiang Mai, Thailand, over the weekend. At a restaurant toilet (yes, I said it right), I saw this newspaper article pasted on the mirror, above the washing basin.

The long and short of it is that the restaurant owners actually owned an Elephant Farm that trains elephants to do tricks. And one of the tricks...you got it --- making the elephant sit on the potty and then after that, flushing the bowl!

My question is --- Did the Thai sewage department actually approve of the sewerage system to 'handle' such a big customer with 'big output'?

I hate to venture into any imagination if no approval was gained...

Such great faith has not been seen...

Once, someone very wisely said to me, "It is better to keep your mouth shut and look stupid, than to open your mouth and confirm it."

I guess this saying does not apply to all situations, eh?

Word has it that when the Defense Minister was asked if he could see anything while looking on with his Bino caps on. He replied with strong enthusiasm that he could see the view ahead and even heaped praises on those involved in the above training exercise.

This man's faith is strong...believing in what he cannot see...

...and also in denial.

Slow Movement --- Any takers?

Ah yes, I can finally get down to updating my blog once again.

The topic I've been most fascinated with lately is the 'Slow Movement'. In case you have never heard of it, here it is:

People stressed. Need a break. Re-think life. Take things easy.

Simple enough?

It all started with this dude who led some Italians to protest at the Piazza di Spagna on the opening of a McDonalds food outlet there (by the way, we discovered that the Piazza is a lovely but extremely busy place when we visited Rome last year). What became a protest against fast food has become a lifestyle choice for many who want to get off the fast track in this rat race we live in...even more so for those of us who live in Singapore and Hong Kong.

With improved technology, we can multi task tonnes of things at the same time but then, forget the purpose of the creation of these technology in the first place. Tell me about it, I just got a new handphone with Wi Fi access. Tempting not to use it to reply my client the very moment he needs me to email him something.

And so, out sprouted Slow Food, Slow Books, Slow Travel, Slow Cities, Slow Living, Slow Schools and Slow Money.

I can agree with most all of it except Slow Money.

Duuuh...

The point to all this is that we should take time to smell the roses (if there are still any. These days, the National Parks Board keeps stocking out parks with Heliconia. No wonder we cannot smell anything even if we wanted to). While this is not a rebellion, it encourages people to enjoy their experiences more in depth. Say, if you were reading a book, instead of rushing through it, rather, take time to absorb the contents of the story.

And so, rather than rush on a 21 day bus around Europe holiday, take a month and half off instead to visit the same places. Or, use your 21 days but spend it in only 2 places. That way, you will be able to fully enjoy and absorb the way of life at your selected destinations.

True, true. I can hear naysayers snorting that this is for the well heeled. Admittedly, 99.5% of us do not have the luxury of being able to take a month and a half off to travel. Also, it means that your finances are being stretched to the max. How to afford?

When the Wife and I went to Europe last year, we did Rome and Paris in 10 days. Comfortable, you might say? Relatively. That very morning after I landed in Paris, I hopped in line with the queues at the Musee D' Orsay, Rodin Museum and the Lourve and covered all 3 famed museums in the space of one afternoon (I can say I've been there done that, but no quality of experience). We did have to wake up at 4am to catch the 5.30am budget plane from Paris to Rome.

On the flip side? We enjoyed a delicious meal of Shawarma whipped up by our chatty Lebanese 'hole-in-the-wall-shop' chef in Paris' red light district; We explored the catacombs located along the world's first paved road; Ate the yummiest Gelati in the world, found in Rome (the wife had it everyday we were in Rome); Overawed by the vastness and grandness of the Versailles Palace and its huge gardens (I promised myself that if I am able to, I will want to go back to the Versaille gardens and have a jog there in the Spring).

Well, having said all that, I wish to make a proposition to all my readers --- Let's start slow...

Take the afternoon off on Friday 8 June 2007. I will bring all of us to an undisclosed location in Singapore to rediscover both your environment and yourself. And pay me a token sum of S$5 for having thought of this idea =)

Those interested, pls email me at tumduck@yahoo.com . This half day journey of re-discovery will go ahead if I have a minimum of 6 people. Why so?
Otherwise no fun lah!

Have yourself a Slow Day!

It's a gal thing

Girls love being pampered...even if it is at the expense of our reputation.

I can virtually see many guys nodding their heads in vigorous unison.

I mean, you hear of guys doing the craziest stuff, all for the sake of proving their undying love for their gal. Sometimes, guys do it as a result of temporal paralysis of the rational mind, being struck by the arrow of cupid. These fellas literally do not know what hit them. Others, you have but no choice but to do as the gal desires or risk losing face and losing your gal.

My point?

Why do you not hear of gals doing crazy stuff to prove of their undying love for their guys?

Ok, before I get pummelled by you gals, actually, you all do prove your love in your own ways, yah?

Except that they might not be too dramatic as the guys'.

In fact, I dare say that guys tend to be all theatrics in the dating phase and then fade away after marriage. Whereas, gals seem to enjoy the guys' theatrics during the dating phase, but end up doing most of the work after marriage.

That, my guy friends, is sacrifical love.

And so, why should we disrupt the order of nature? Leave things the way as it is!

Kidding yah!

(guys, at this moment, I am being held by me Wife with a dough rolling pin pointed at my head. For the things I am about to write, pls forgive me for committing treason against the band of brothers)


A fairy tale of magic, was what we never planned.
Two hearts in search for true love, brought as one from different lands.
I thought I must be dreaming, the day that I found you.
And now my life's worth living, and grey skies are turned to blue

Chorus:
Oh Serena, I knew from the start,
That the love we have will stand all tests and never tear us apart
Oh yes Serena, my promise is true.
I will hold you tight till the cold night is through,
Girl, I love you.

The majesty of nature, on this terrestial ball,
But there a flower blooming stands the chiefest of them all.
This flower's like no other, her colours pure and bright.
This flower's you my precious as you freely share your light.


Forever Serena
Music and lyrics by Paul Lim
March 2002

Presenting Ibumie HarMee

Calling all foodies! The latest sensational instant noodles has come to town!

Have wonderful memories of pigging out in Penang, Malaysia? This latest product is inspired by the street hawkers in Penang selling a well known dish called Penang Har Mee (or prawn noodles).

You might think that it is just another instant noodle brand in the market...but wait, here are a few reasons why you should try this product:

1) No preservatives

2) Soup base powder is ACTUAL prawn stock!

3) Noodle quality is superior to many competing brands

4) One of the more unique and interesting flavours in the market (not your usual Chicken or Tom Yam or Curry flavours)

This product is currently available at most provision shops islandwide and can be found at Sheng Siong and Prime Supermarkets.

And so, your next question is: How do you know so much about this product?

Honestly?

I am the Brand Manager for this noodle =)

But seriously, give it a try. You will not be able to give an opinion until you first try it.

I welcome all comments and feedback on this product.

Enjoy your HarMee today!

Obituary for a Car

The family of Paul

Toyota Vios 1.5 litre

would like to thank all friends and relatives who have been so supportive of us during this time of loss. We would like to thank car salesman D*** for first introducing Vios to us back in 2004. Special thanks goes out to all the mechanics at Mova and Borneo Motors who have laboured so hard to give Vios a better lease of life.

Vios has been called life in a better place (likely India or Vietnam). During Vios' short time in our care, it has gone through so much, having travelled to Kuala Lumpur and Malacca and frequently into Johor Bahru. Vios unfortunately succumbed to its injuries (a punctured tire, noisy air con belt, ripping leather seats and interior, neglect from regular car washes).

Vios, you will always be special to us.

Definitely Halal (safe for Muslim consumption)

For those of you who are still trying to figure out why I put this picture up, well, it's in the spelling.

Know the answer yet?

The Wife and I can sometimes be real asses when it comes to being pedantic about spelling accuracy (those of you in the same league, please go read 'Eats Shoots & Leaves' by Lynn Truss. Enjoy!). But for the layman in us, here's where the spelling went wrong:

No Pork

No Lark

I trust they do not have bird meat in my sliced fish soup.

I wonder if bird meat can actually be considered part of a bowl of Seafood soup...

My Long Hiatus from Blogging

Yes, it has unfortunately been too long since I have been away from my blog. To my readers, thousands of apologies. Busy with work, church and lotsa other stuff.

So what have I been up to? Well, early in the year, I was in an exciting final round interview with UBS bank for their Wealth Management Associate Program. Of the 1500 applicants, the attrition rate was 98% going into the final round! We had to sit for an online numerical and IQ test. Then go down in person to UBS for another numerical test. Then we were shortlisted for interviews. In the final round, UBS would place you in a mansion they rented and like the reality TV series 'Big Brother' or 'Temptation Island' or etc, you will have to fight it out in some tests 'reality' situational tests with the other applicants that are divided into 5 groups of 8. To cut the story short, I did not make it but lived to tell the story to my grandchild. Congrats to M.C. who made it out of our group!

Speaking of grandchild, I do not have any as of yet, but a child, well, kiddo is on the way. Coming our way in September to be exact. Excited? Stressed? Anticipation? Nah! In all honesty, moi does not know what to expect but to prepare for many sleepless nights. Thankfully, The Wife has had a decent pregnancy thus far. The only thing she is concerned about is wanting to have a natural delivery versus being cut up like prime meat in the butcher shop. Pork chops, anyone?

Just came back from a 1 night trip to Batam. Harris Resort may not have 5-star facilities, but they more than adequately make up in service. Picture this: Friends and I are playing water polo (the easy version of course. No one treads in the water here as water reaches to our waists. Besides, we ain't no pros!) and some time in the middle of the game, the hotel has someone deliver a platter of fruits served on skewers for our 'Half Time' refreshment! At no cost and without us requesting for it! We were just stunned at this simple gesture of initiative and generosity.

Or how about when we were being ferried by bus back to the hotel. They got another minivan along so that all 30 of us could have adequate space and comfort after a heavy meal. And the ride was only 1 min!

My friends, go to Harris Resort in Batam and you will not go wrong. Look for Stylianos, the fun and well loved greek General Manager of this resort. Mind you, he speaks fluent Bahasa Indonesia.

Another new thing in my life -- a new car! Yes, we have decided to get the Hyundai Avante and trade-in our Toyota Vios. With this new car, I am breaking new ground in my life:

1) I am choosing a Hyundai! Had bad experience with Hyundai before and my impression of it has never been great till I saw and tested the Avante.

2) I decided on a Silver coloured car. Groan! Don't remind me. In the past, I used to complain about how Singaporeans can be so dull with their car's choice of colour. Singaporeans tend to be very safe when it comes to making decisions...even for their car's colour. My Vios was orange and my Hyundai will sadly be silver, a nice shade though (am scrapping the bottom of the barrel here, people). But why silver?

Black is cool but makes the car look small. White is nice but will have tough time cleaning and maintaining it. Dark Violet is nice but too common. Mountain Blue reminds me of my heritage (Hainan Blue). Red looks just wrong on this car.

Ma'am, I would like Continental Silver for the colour of my car.

They deliberately placed the word 'Continental' in front of the 'Silver' so as to appease my choice. "It's not just ANY silver you are choosing. It's 'Continental Silver'!"

Pray tell me what does the word 'Continental' describe when it comes to colours? 'Dark Silver', I can understand. 'Light Silver', I kapish. Even 'Pearl White' is fine with me.

How does 'Continental' describe a colour?

Interestingly, as I took stock of the things I have purchased or intend to purchase, my list looks something like this:


Car - Was Toyota (Japanese); Now Hyundai (Korean)
Mobile phone - Was Motorola (US); Now Samsung (Korean)
TV - Was Toshiba (Japanese); Now Samsung (Korean)
Home Sound System - Was Philips (Netherlands); Now Samsung (Korean)
DVD Camera - Samsung (Korean)
Bluetooth Earpiece - Samsung (Korean)


In all honesty, I never realised how Korean we have been until I made this list. Something has happened while we were all sleeping in the past 5 years!

1 more interesting fact --- At Harris Resort Batam, we saw signs in English, Bahasa and Korean. Not Japanese but Korean. In fact, the resort brochure lists a Japanese restaurant on their premises. I went to check it out. The signage says 'Japanese Restaurant' all right...but the menu and food are all in Korean.

The Japanese are not going to be too pleased.

Frigid panda

Yeah, it's really quite hilarious but true! I could not help but burst out laughing while reading this article in the newspapers.

So someone's not getting any action these days eh?

But the real question is: will this method work?

I mean, let's be really honest about it --- the act of copulation is a 2-way thing. Unless of course, the act is paid for, as in a business transaction. So while it might work for the male panda, how about the female panda? Don't the zoo keepers know that the female species are a hard species to get through to? They should have videos for the male on how to cuddle the female panda and how to give back rubs. Not panda porn!

And back to our frigid panda --- who were the sickos who filmed the porn pandas in action?

My suggestion ----- forget the porn. Go straight for Viagara, Cialis, Tongkat Ali. And don't forget artificial insemination.

Tsk, tsk. Even zoos these days are facing declining birth rates.

Actually, come to think of it, if this method works for the pandas, would the government use this similar method to encourage human baby making? I mean, it would have to be proven with pandas but why should we stop at pandas? I should really write in to the Singapore Feedback Unit to offer this solution to our declining birth rates.

I somehow sense The Wife's hand reaching over to pinch, twist and pull my right ear....

A song to see you through life

I hope you never lose your sense of wonder
You get your fill to eat but always keep that hunger
May you never take one single breath for granted
God forbid love ever leave you empty handed
I hope you still feel small when you stand by the ocean
Whenever one door closes I hope one more opens
Promise me you'll give faith a fighting chance
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance
I hope you dance

I hope you never fear those mountains in the distance
Never settle for the path of least resistance
Living might mean taking chances but they're worth taking
Lovin' might be a mistake but it's worth making
Don't let some hell bent heart leave you bitter
When you come close to selling out reconsider
Give the heavens above more than just a passing glance
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance
I hope you dance

Lee Ann Womack

Happy Birthday Winne!

To our dear friend who is a capable being and confidante to The Wife, may this year bring you much joy to keep you optimistic; minimal pain to keep you in check with the realities of life; great hope to keep you on your feet; and much laughter to preserve your sanity (not that you are anywhere near insane or anything).

Happy Birthday, Dear Winne!

(btw, the candles are not indicative of your true age)

Does your hairdresser caress your ear?

I kid you not.

So I decided to take a stroll to the hairdresser around the corner. My regular hairdresser went on MC today and will continue to be away for the Chinese New Year. Well, I do need to look decent for the New Year when visiting relatives. Also, there is this cousin's wedding coming up and I really do not want to turn up at his wedding with the newly shorn look. Today would be a good day to cut hair.

Gone are the days when I went to ethnic barbers to have my hair cut. When I mean ethnic, I mean barber shops with chairs in a row manned by either Malays (always known as Sri Dewa), the Chinese (known for using a blade to scrape your neck after the cut, and also provide ear digging services), and the Indian barber. A haircut will set you back no more than S$10 for an adult male. I have given up on those days. Being converted whilst studying overseas, I have since moved on to professional hairstylists who actually wash your hair before the cut (ok, ok, it took me that long to progress). But progress I did! I have had my hair cut in New York City, Toronto, Melbourne, etc. Some of them are pretty good stylists. My all time favourite -- Jack Giordano, an Italian who emigrated to Burlington, Ontario, Canada. He rocks!

I entered the hairdresser that was around the corner, for the first time. I was attended by a gentleman who resembled someone just released delinquent school. But then, judge not, I must. Because Chinese New Year is around the corner, it is a practice that hairdressers and barbers impose a mandatory self declared tip, on top of the regular price of a haircut. I shrugged it off. Where else would I go? To the military barber? God forbid!

I must say that his scalp massage was pretty good and decided to relax and enjoy the hair wash.


When it was time to rinse my hair at the sink, I lay back and let the water do its job. Well, looks like the water was not the only thing doing its job.

I realised that the male hairdresser was caressing my ear!

(I pause here to choke)

And he did it while washing my hair and ear and cupping it ever so tenderly....arrgh!

I need a cold shower.

Ok, so maybe I was overreacting. But honestly, the way he did it and the amount of time he took to wash my hair (and ears), I am really intrigued that his lady boss (sitting outside reading a mag) did not even complain about the huge amount of water he had wasted. Honestly, I have never had a longer hair wash in my life! And while my gay-dar was on (ya know, radar for a different sexual orientation), right in front of me was a promotional poster for a hair product where the model was topless save her hands cupping her breast strategically. I guess the Yin and Yang of things are balanced here. But hey, that dude is still cupping my ears!

Yes, I may have been over sensitive. But going by my track record, a white guy tried once to pick me up; my very gay colleague would only complete the work if I allowed him to grope my chest; and was once winked at and air kissed by a transvestite at a supermarket....I think it is wise to be a little more alert.

I have nothing against gays per se. It is just those who are the desperate ones who are trying hard to 'get to know you', them I detest. Much like a creep who thinks he is god's gift to women, harassing every skirt that walks by him.

I suddenly am gaining an insight into a woman's violation...

After the haircut was done (which was done quite decently), and the payment made, hairdresser gave me his sweetest smile and waved effeminately, while leaning on one leg and making limp the other.

I'm going back to Agnes next time round.

Disposed accordingly...For the want of a better phrase

It is an extremely curious thing to find an ad in the classifieds asking for the next of kin to contact a certain hospital to reclaim the remains of a patient who passed away.

Why curious?

The ad was located in the most obscure of locations in the classifieds (in between the project tenders page and the Jobs section). Honestly, what are the chances of your next of kin flipping through the classifieds and finding out that your remains need to be reclaimed?

But well, this is hospital procedure...yes, we have to inform the public...we have made reasonable effort to contact the next of kin (really depends on your definition of 'reasonable').

I mean, come on, can we try a bit harder? Like placing a notice on the home page of your hospital web site? That would not cost a cent! Or, if your corporate communications department had a little more creativity, talk to a journalist and persuade them to place a regular column in the main spread for unclaimed bodies. They regularly write stories to inform the public about missing persons in the custody of the Police. Why not human bodies?

Doh! But of course! Because they are DEAD!

But the other thing I noticed was the concluding paragraph where it states "Please note that the body of the deceased will be disposed accordingly..."

I know it is a medically accepted term to say that a body is to be disposed of. But oh such cold, heartless and distant language it exudes!

"the body will be disposed of accordingly..."

Yes, our remains are disposable but surely we are not akin to diapers or styrofoam cups or scrap paper. Could we at least try to show more compassion even for the deceased?

English language teachers, save our societies from further coldness.

Junior's grown!

Well, well. Looks like Lim Junior is doing well in the water bag of The Wife's womb.

Yes, a visit to the Gynae confirmed that the Lim offspring is doing well, thus far.

You can actually make out the head from the picture on the left and upon magnifying the picture at the Gynae's, you could actually see the area where the brain will be formed; and the tiny heart beating away!

Wonders of nature isn't it?

Which quite naturally brings to mind the position that Pro-Choice proponents push --- that life does not begin at conception (I stand corrected if this statement is errorneous). So how does one explain the tiny dot pumping away in the heart chamber of the foetus?

Work hard to get ahead in life...Truth or lie?

I know that is a hotly debated topic and a monkey that is constantly on the government's back. But the stark reality is true --- there is a substantial number of middle aged people in the work force who are out of jobs and the numbers are set to rise. I do not have the numbers to back me up but do bear with me as I take you through my thoughts.

Asian kids will hear this familiar refrain: Study hard and work hard to succeed in life. Truth or a lie?

Very recently, I had opportunity to assist at a recruitment agency and the number of resumes you receive from middle aged persons seeking employment is just overwhelming. Mind you, when I mean middle aged, I do not mean person in their 50s. What I deem as 'middle aged' are those 38 years old and above.

I am not the least bit joking.

Take for instance an ad for a managerial post in Marketing in the FMCG (Fast moving consumer goods) industry was seeking an individual with 8 years of relevant work experience. As I sifted through the resumes, my colleague helped me by 'shortlisting' them.

Too old (candidate was 38 years old??!!!); Non relevant experience (candidate had extensive marketing experience in food products and dried milk powder and the job post was for fresh dairy products. Am I missing out something here?); too highly qualified (candidate had a Masters in Marketing).

At the end of the exercise, I shortlisted 2 probable candidates but my colleague decided against them. Why? For the very reasons I have stated above.

And so, when seeking a middle to senior managerial position locally, you must not be too old (35 years and below) but have enough RELEVANT experience and cannot be too highly educated.

As I looked through some of the resumes sent in, I could not help but sympathise with many. There were those in their 40s and were previously in Senior positions heading companies. Now, they are just satisfied with a middle management post. Some are even willing to take entry level positions.

I have the stories of 2 friends to share with you.

One is a father of 3 daughters with the eldest in her 1st year at university and the youngest is 16 years old. A couple of years back, he was CEO of an IT company and had enough money to live in a landed property at a prime location. Then he was retrenched and has never found another job since. He is in his late 40s to early 50s.

Another friend is 40 this year and is a Country manager for a foreign company. He fears that if he is made redundant, he will not be able to find another job again. He has no children but is married.

We have been told to work hard in order to get into premier schools and that would get us prestigious scholarships at premier universities that would lead us to a career with bright prospects.

The reality? Hit 35 years and above and I suggest you think of a backup plan when you are out of a job. Yes, not 'if' but 'when' you are out of a job.

The Straits Times recently did an article on this issue of middle age joblessness. Even top government scholars were not spared and these were considered Singapore's brightest who were trained at top universities worldwide. Come 35 to 45 years of age and you will have to make way for the just-as-bright scholar but is 30 years of age to replace you.

I am not discounting the virtue of hard work. I am all for hard work and I am a hard worker myself. My point is: Will pure hard work get you to your goal? Will it assure you of your job in your mid 30s, 40s and 50s?

I would like to hear your thoughts.

She wore blue braces

I was strolling at Vivocity early this afternoon. Got to make full use of my 2 more days of freedom before I become slave to my new employer.

Of course, there were the usual Singapore-map-flipping-tourists who were trying to find their way around; and then there was me, flipping the map of Vivocity just trying to find my way around even after having been there like about 5 times already! And then there were the usual wannabes decked from head to toe in their Gucci and Prada apparel, walking around as if the mall belonged to them...ok, perhaps it may belong to one of their parents.

A girl caught my eye.

Lest ye have any less than savoury thoughts, let me enlighten you further.

This girl was in her late 20s and she caught my eye. She was wearing a janitor's uniform, doing her rounds keeping the mall clean. I observed her from a distance and could not help but conclude that she may be mildly mentally disabled due to her gait and her facial expression (ma'am, should you happen be this girl that I am writing about and happen to read my blog and are not the least bit mentally disabled, I profusely apologise unreservedly. As compensation, I will gladly autograph for you a copy of the first ultrasound of Baby Lim, as seen in my previous entry).

But what struck me were 3 things:

1) Her cheerful disposition

She was walking together with a colleague. The colleague did not look mentally disabled but he was not the least bit cheerful. Perhaps he had a bad day; perhaps he was going through some difficulties with his boss. Whatever the case, the contrast was that stark. Girl is mentally challenged but was cheerful. Guy was normal but looked grumpy.


2) She wore blue braces (not blue velvet...perhaps only oldies fans will appreciate this pun)

Mentally challenged as she was, her carer took the effort to help her get braces for her teeth. They were not boring coloured braces, they were bright blue! Ok, regardless of the colour, the point is, someone actually wanted her to look nice by straightening her teeth and wanted the process to be enjoyable by recommending her a bright blue colour. In short, people who were caring for her wanted her to live life as normally as possible. This example, to me, is something seldom seen in Singapore or any other country for that matter (I used to do social work in Victoria, Australia, where its state welfare programs are one of the best in the world).


3) She is a contributing part of the workforce and society at large

Two hurdles are overcome here. Firstly, the openness on the carers' part to let her work. Secondly, the willingness of the janitorial company and Vivocity to allow her to work in full view of the public.

I will never forget her bright smile with the bright blue braces. But more importantly, she was given a chance to contribute to society and assimilate into it. And as a result, she happily carried out her job, oblivious to the crowd throngs that pass her daily. I can also imagine the many obstacles her carers faced when getting her the job. People to convince, others to persuade. Politics and personal agendas could have been and may still be in play.

But for bright blue braces, she is blissfully cleaning Singapore's biggest mall.

Junior's habitat - 9 months only

Rather fascinating to have an up close view of Junior's habitat for the next 9 months. Yes, that uneven ring of black (located just off centre, towards the left) will be my offspring's home (to those who are still trying to figure out what I am saying, the ring is the amniotic fluid or the water bag).

Stay tuned to see scans of the foetus in a couple of weeks' time!

We are officially Pregnant!

Yes, to all of you who have been cheering us on (or have simply given up) to have a kid, we are happy to announce that we are pregnant!

To those of you who are wondering why I used 'we are pregnant' instead of 'my wife is pregnant', well, I am afraid that it was something insisted upon by The Wife. I guess it is politically correct to say 'we are pregnant' instead of 'she is pregnant'.

Why?

Maybe it subliminally helps the man take mental responsibility for the 9 months of agony the woman goes through; perhaps it is just a weak 'claiming of ownership' attempt from males who feel alienated by the powerful feminist movement that attributes full ownership rights to women who are carrying a child in the womb; most likely, it could be to clarify that the kid in the womb happens to also belong to the rightful man.

Hey! These days, you never know! There is so much confusion disputing whose baby belongs to which guy. And so, I think it is quite appropriate that the term 'we are pregnant' can be confidently applied when a couple is pretty much certain that the kid belongs to them.

Err...dear, the kid's mine, right?...Dear?

Although the kid is now a zygote (no bigger than 2cm) and is expected to come to term only this September, for those of you who are in the spirit of giving, what with Chinese New Year around the corner, please help us recoup our losses --- from our 3 years of having to spend Chinese New Year by just giving out Red Packets and getting nothing back in return --- by simply forwarding us your kind and generous monetary donations made in the name of our zygote, Zygote Lim. We accept MasterCard, Visa, JCB, PayPal, Cash, Cheque and Telegraphic Transfer. All donations are hereby welcome to be made on an indefinite rolling and ongoing basis, even after Zygote Lim has attained the age of majority (In Singapore, the drinking age is 18 years old but to be able to watch nudity at the cinemas, you need to be 21 years of age. In light of Zygote Lim's unwillingness to be denied 3 year's worth of generous donations and to give slower donors an equal opportunity to give, we will set the age of majority in Singapore at 21 years old.

All donations are tax free and cannot be refunded regardless of whether Zygote Lim comes to term or not. Should Zygote Lim decide to wait a few more years before coming to existence, all donations shall be duly and equally divided between The Wife and myself, wherewith we shall use all proceeds to take a super long vacation to the Caribbean Islands. Gifts in kind are not encouraged as we do not look forward to having 20 milk bottles, 6 baby strollers and 44 high chairs. Should such a scenario take place, we shall in no means prevent ourselves from selling off redundant items on Yahoo Auctions or eBay to obtain additional income from your generous gifts).